Can someone tattoo this on my ass
And here he is before his haircut.
He is evolving…
Have you ever been so mad you learned how to walk
pomeranians are literally emotionally attached to their fur and when they get it cut off they can get depressed
iOS 7 more like iOS 7% of my battery left.
nothing pisses me off more than the fact that 90% of women’s jeans have non-functioning pockets but baby clothes have proper pockets? what are babies carrying around that i’m not? baby wallets? fuck off
I did an experiment 7 months ago and compared my then 6 month old’s jean pockets to mine. This was the result:
If this doesn’t prove how fucked up women’s fashion is I don’t know what will.
anal sneezes are cute as shit
sorry iphone the word i was looking for was “animal” sneezes better luck next time
this is not what i want to be remembered for
if you are attracted to me you are required by law to tell me.
somebody give me a pep talk
when the teacher asks you to answer the question because you weren’t paying attention but you know the answer
i’ve dated at least *counts on fingers* zero people
*Wakes up in the middle of the night*
Please don't be 6am
MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS TO ME!
*Shoves face back into pillow*